These things (and people) will change

People don’t change.

That’s what I used to think and believe. But as you can probably surmise from the headline of this blog post, I clearly don’t believe that anymore.

I’ll back up a bit. I think when I’d say “people don’t change,” I was being too absolute. When I said “people don’t change,” I think I meant that their actions don’t change. Their vices don’t change. I thought if you had a friend who’s a constant gossip, they’ll probably always be that way and continue to talk about other people negatively (and likely, you, too) and try to get into your business. I thought if you had a boyfriend cheat, they’d probably do it again and it’s best to hit the road so you can avoid another massive unpleasantry. I thought if you knew someone who would always criticize you, well, they’d probably keep at it.

While some of those examples I still kind of believe are true, I realized something in the past few weeks. Certain aspects of people, like their personality, likely won’t change (in my opinion). But, the way people react to, view and approach situations in their lives will, because of the inevitability of life experience.

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Being authentic and true

authenticity, orlando, heart mural, positivity, life, inspiration, Maybe it’s because I’m a Scorpio, but it’s impossible for me to hide my emotions.

Whether I’m stressed, or excited, or upset, I do a pretty bad job of hiding it. If I’m feeling a negative emotion, I get anxious, I stop talking and I can’t make good eye contact. You can read my poker face, because I don’t have one. It’s just not in me.

I’ve often been hard on myself for this, and it’s also caused me guilt. I’m hypersensitive, so if I even detect a slight shift in mood in somebody else, I immediately think it’s my fault or they’re upset with me. Nine times out of ten, they’re probably just having a bad day. So, that’s where the guilt comes in for me, because I know I’m sure I’ve done that to other people with my inability to mask my feelings. Continue reading “Being authentic and true”

Looking back & ahead: New Year’s resolutions

I love the idea of a fresh start. The notion of reinvention and rebirth is fascinating and inspiring, and it’s something I think about often. That’s one of the reasons I love this time of year. Like most people, I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting as the year draws to a close. Things I accomplished, things I learned, things I’m proud of, and things I could do better in the new year.

Here, I want to explore some of those and share what I’m aspiring to do in 2019.

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Making positivity a priority

DSC_0763I wasn’t always the most positive person.

It wasn’t so much that I was overly negative before, but I’d say I was easily discouraged and highly impatient. Sometimes, I still am (no one is ever going to be perfectly positive), but I have learned to look on the bright side a lot more.

Often, whether it was school or starting a new job, a creeping self doubt would emerge because of internal frustration. Why wasn’t I a master at something as soon as I started? Why did I make mistakes? Did literally everyone know more than I did? This is incredibly flawed and unrealistic thinking, and it’s one of the things that caused a lot of anxiety and negativity in my life.

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